I remember back in the day..When life was so simple..No worries..No regrets...Breaking hearts and taking names!.. But now, as I have gotten older, and life changes.. And love has become more difficult to find and to hold on to.. I long for companionship, for someone to hold on to at night and share thoughts and dreams with.. Someone to give myself to, both physically and mentally.. Someone to appreciate my body and give it the attention it deserves.. As well as my mind.. I dont want to be alone, all by myself..
Have you ever loved someone so unconditionally, youwould do anything just to see them smile.Just to know that they were happy was enough for you to be content. To hear them laugh is your greatest joy. To kiss them leaves you breathless and walking on air. Hugging them makes you fell so safe and secure it feels like no one and nothing can hurt you? To hold their hand in front of people is a event that you enjoy more than anything, just to show others you love him?
I felt, like I was made of stone. Bone dry from bleedin', everytime I thought of leavin'. My voice was taken from my mouth. THen you came through rain to my door. The streets were abandoned, soaked through you were standin. and the water was floodin' the ground. So don't call my name, if you can't bear the weight.
It's been a long road, to feelin' alright. But, I get there one step at a time. They will string you up baby, wherever you are. Just as long as your ropes are tied.
So dont' confuse, me with somebody else. WHo might cower or cry out. Cheat, steal from you or lie about, what my intentions might be.
Well we might be a couple of jerks. Who took leave of our senses. Set fire to our fences and laid our hearts on the tracks.
Please don't call my name. If you cant bear the weight.
So lay. Your ears to the ground. Can't you hear that train comin? Ain't no use in runnin'. It's bound. To roll you down. Don't call my name if you can't bear the wait.
You might think it's wrong,
For me to look at you that way.
Oh, but what do you know about a woman like me?
There's not a whole lot you can say, that hasn't already been said before,
Cause they've all got ideas about the world.
But, I dont pay em' no mand cause I'm occupied,
Smearin my lipstick and tearin out my curls.
I went down in a rabbit hole.
Just went lookin' for a warm place.
And either by salvation or by consumption,
I bound into your grace.
And it's just like swingin' from the end of a rope,
high aboce where my feet don't toch the ground.
I drink another and I hope against hope,
hold my breath and try not to make a sound.
I don't blame you.(repeat twice)
I don't belong to you,
Baby you don't belong to me,
but I wanna meet cha now and again when the lights get blurred.
Oh, and you need a soft place where the fall don't hurt so...
I left my heart on the side of the road,
laid it there to rot like useless overthrow.
Oh, you stirred the feathers on the cold hard ground.
It was you and me when no one was around.
I dont blame you, no I don't.
As i sit at this computer.. I have time to reflect. Why only now i don't know. Have I really lived to my full potential in the few years i have been on this earth? Did i take all the chances i had? did i feel the excitement, love, joy? I know i have felt anger and sorrow. I have felt loss. But what about the lighter side. I seem to prefer serenity some days, and a full on adrenaline rush other day. i am a passionate, yet sometimes witheld lover. I put my heart and soul into all i do. But is that good enough? Will that make my laife fufillung? I hope so. Cause I love my life. I enjoy being myself and doing what i love. YOu should all do the same. Surfing is love. Peace.
PS
This may be allover the place and mean nothing but oh well. I like it.
DOnt Worry about me, Tell all your friends that i'm dead, i'll fly under your radars, and surf my life away. I will alwasy defy what is thout to be the standards. I will REBEL against the higher power. I will never fall to your opinions. I am me, as i have always been, and always will be. I wont change for you. FOrget my name? I'll remind you. Talk about me? WHy? i dont take the time to care. DOn't fight they say? THen how am i to feel better? Fighting. A form of dance almost. Taking extreme focus and control. That is why you dont. Surfing. Calm. Relaxing. ISolating. Surf where no one knows, and if you drown, who'll know? I'm already dead.
